Too Much Sun

    Does it count as drunk driving if the person doing the steering and working the pedals is sober but the one doing the shifting has had a few more than one? I am going to say no.

    I played my first round of golf over the weekend. A complete 15 holes. That was all my team mate and I could take. The day started out well enough. Ten guys hitting the links for the start of a bachelor party. Then we got to the first tee. I am not horrible. I hit a few decent shots. Sadly, my best drive we could not find, even though it clearly landed on the fairway. Others we could not find because they landed two holes over across a pond. I had some decent putts. I don't think any of the greens were particularly difficult either. I had at least two rim out. That has to be the most demoralizing thing in the world. You do all that work. Hit the ball as best you can over and over. Then, right when victory is within your grasp, you miss by a half inch and have to take that ten because everyone is yelling at you to stop holding up the group. That didn't actually happen. We were playing best shot, and we are really good at cheating, so the worst we got on any hole was an 8 and we didn't even play those two. Seriously, that is when it became not worth it and we spent the next two holes driving around drinking more beer. Busch classic. That is not what it is actually called, but it wasn't Busch light. Doesn't everyone just make something plausible up when they don't really know what they are talking about? Well they should. On one hole, the rule was you had to use a seven iron on every shot (there was a rule for each hole). On the seven iron hole, I teed off using a crushed Coors Light can. It was my second best shot of the day.

   I got a great sun burn on the course. I wore a polo with a sleeveless athletic shirt underneath. It was too hot on the back nine, so I took the polo off and proceeded to make it look like I had a white shirt on all the time. Luckily we went to the pool Monday afternoon during the hottest part of the day and I burned the heck out of the rest of me, so it just looks like I am an Indian. That's not racist. I think this is the end of this post.

"If you don't have anything nice to say, say it under your breath."